so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Randomize