Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
