So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
