I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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