i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
