i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
