Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Randomize
