What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
