What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
