It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize