as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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