At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize