Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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