discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
