This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
