What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
