Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
