that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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