Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
where am i from again
only if we run a train.
done.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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