belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
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