what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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