I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
