I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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