I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
