i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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