It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
