I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
