I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
