Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
