susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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