you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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