it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
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