wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize