Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Let's get the cat blown out
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
