he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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