Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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