I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Randomize
