remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
And then he peed in my hair
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