Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
