Joe is yelling at the trees again.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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