I'm drive I can fine osifer
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
