his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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