Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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