WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
