its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
