and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
