Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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