We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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