quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
