ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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